In these cases, families were unable to provide needed supports such start-of-school-materials, attendance at early school year events, and timely drop-offs or pick-ups which left students feeling humiliated from the start. I needed to be super sensitive to what might cause public humiliation and result in flight, fright, freeze, or fight mode. Looking back, I understand that I needed to give them more time to let me know who they were, what they needed-time to settle in, form relationships, relay information, and build trust. As I think of a few children who felt unwelcome from day one in my classroom, I realize those children came to school with great socio-economic-emotional complexity. It is important to understand what students feel makes up a safe and welcoming environment, not just our own understanding of this. We cannot downplay a student's need to feel safe and valued in the classroom and school community.
